your mouth’s been in dirtier places
your mouth’s been in dirtier places
in which Starbrand embodies all high school students of past, present and future
"Do you take credit cards?"
"We do," Steve says. "I’m Steve. Would you like a- a, uh, turn?"
He cringes after he says it, hearing how it sounds, and the man grins. “How many kisses do you have left?”
"I clock out in six hours," Steve says.
The man nods. “I’m Tony Stark. I’ll give you ten thousand dollars for six hours worth of kisses.”
Steve stares. The man- Tony- doesn’t look insane. He’s is well-dressed, sticking out like a sore thumb in the midst of people wearing jeans and ratty tee-shirts. His shoes alone probably cost more than Steve’s entire wardrobe.
"You don’t have to," Tony says, smiling. "Just thought I’d give it a shot. I’d much prefer you say yes, though."
"Um," Steve says, unsure how to put it. "I’m- not a prostitute?"
Tony raises his eyebrows. “I’m aware. The sign above your head, however, advertises a kissing booth, and if you’re up for it, I’d like to pay more than is advertised for a day’s worth of kisses.”
"Six hours," Steve croaks, and clears his throat. His eyes go over Tony one last time, and he flushes when he gets caught. Tony’s grin widens.
Steve looks at the credit card held between Tony’s fingers. “You’re serious?”
"Deadly," Tony says, and cocks his head. "You don’t know who I am, do you?"
Steve frowns. “You told me who you are.”
Tony laughs, like he has an inside joke he isn’t telling Steve. “Give me the credit card swiper, Steve.”
He swipes his card, and nods to Steve to punch in the numbers. Steve pushes ‘1-0’ and then more zeroes than he’s comfortable with, and then presses go.
Transaction completed, the machine blinks at him, and Steve swallows. “Huh. Guess I have to, now.”
"You don’t have to," Tony says, and Steve goggles at him.
"You just paid ten thousand dollars. One kiss is three bucks. That means I owe you-"
He pauses, and Tony finishes it for him. “3333 kisses. I’ll settle for how many you’re willing to give me over the remaining six hours you have on the clock, though.”
Steve ends up giving him kiss number 3333 five days later, when they’re lying in Tony’s bed after getting distracted halfway through lunch.
Tony hums against his lips. “Mm. You just gave me the last one I paid for,” he says, and Steve doesn’t get it for a moment, but he laughs when he does.
"This one’s for free," he says, and pecks Tony on the mouth. "This one you owe me three bucks for," he adds and kisses Tony again, who chuckles into his mouth.
im still here waiting for Pedro pascal to be announced as doctor strange and for the minuscule snowpiercer fandom to pick up on the curtis/nam ship
“I am Iron Man. The suit and I are one. To turn over the Iron Man suit would be to turn over myself, which is tantamount to indentured servitude or prostitution, depending on what state you’re in. You can’t have it.”
Pedro Pascal as Tony Stark
Actor Chris Pratt beamed down to our sector of the universe Monday night to surprise an auditorium full of deserving kids in a special New York Daily News and Disney Studios sponsored charity screening of the superheroes-in-space flick.
And the 35-year-old actor who plays the hero Star-Lord in the Marvel movie stayed in the theater until every last one of them who wanted to take a picture with him got their selfie.
“That was really fun, this is what is all about,” said a visibly touched Pratt after the show. “I get impatient sometimes being on a promotional tour all the time, but something like this I would sit here as long as it took to take a picture with every one of those guys.”
“Tonight was really special to me.”
Pratt stayed long past the time his security detail was supposed to whisk him away to answer questions and give some words of wisdom.
Time’s up. My ride is here.
"Does Steve like flowers?"
"How the hell should I know?"
"Because you’ve known him forever. Come on, lay it on me."
"I don’t think Steve cares about flowers."
"He’s got to like some flowers, Bucky. Wait, was he allergic before he got Cap-i-fied?”
"Just answer the question, I’m not paying you to screw around."
"You are literally paying me nothing, ass, I live here. No, he wasn’t allergic, and thank god because almost everything else made the guy sick. And I think I remember him saying he likes tulips one time."
"Tulips! Great, I’ll get him those."
"Don’t go overboard, Stark."
"Do I seem like the kind of person to go overboard?"
"Get one bouquet, Tony. A small one. Steve gets uncomfortable if people try to give him a lot of stuff. You should’ve seen him after a senator tried to give him a house, looked like he was eating a lemon. I get you like to spoil people, Stark, but believe me, Steve won’t react well to it.”
"I think a room full of tulips would fit in really nicely somewhere on Steve’s floor."
"God. Buy him some candy hearts while you’re at it, write tiny love notes on them with lasers."
"That wouldn’t work, it’d melt the chocolate."
"Please don’t write him tiny love notes on chocolate."
"Psshh. If I ever tried to write love notes, I’d probably write something like, ‘roses are red, violets are blue, we should totally bang, now please.’”
"Wow. That was awful. Why am I helping you again?"
"Because according to you, we’re the stubbornest idiots ever and we don’t know how to talk about our feelings and you want to make sure we do something about said feelings before one of us dies in a Doombot invasion. Also you want Steve to get laid. Which I am eternally grateful for."
"Go buy the kid some goddamn tulips, Tony."
"Eternally grateful, Bucky."